just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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