She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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