Screwed.edu
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
