i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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