just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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