wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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