Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
