I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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