i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize