The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
