what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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