Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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