is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left the knife in your bed.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize