Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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