people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize