I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize