Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
My vagina just clenched in fear
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize