Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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