I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
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