Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
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