omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
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