Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
