I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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