They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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