ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
