508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
