You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I just want nice things and good sex
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
