WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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