I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
