in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
