69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Edward fifth and chaser hands
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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