'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
My pussy is not your playground.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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