White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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