just tell him i said nine months
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
