hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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