Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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