Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
This toilet bowl is my home.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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