I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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