Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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