We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
