There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
there is another microwave in the elevator.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
