Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
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