He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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