Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(906): View more from Michigan

so... i had sex tonight

(906): View more from Michigan

with a midget

(906): View more from Michigan

nicccce tits for a little person

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(906): so... i had sex tonight (906): with a midget (906): nicccce tits for a little person http://tfl.nu/2uyc

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(662): View more from Mississippi

My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.

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(662): My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room. http://tfl.nu/yex2

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(218): View more from Minnesota

Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.

(763): View more from Minnesota

ew wtf

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(218): Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed. (763): ew wtf http://tfl.nu/st4c

Replies (83) Good night (1333) Bad night (8169)
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(727): View more from Florida

but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something

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(727): but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something http://tfl.nu/beva

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(203): View more from Connecticut

she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.

(860): View more from Connecticut

what did you do?

(203): View more from Connecticut

i asked her out. that's so hot.

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(203): she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex. (860): what did you do? (203): i asked her out. that's so hot. http://tfl.nu/dg3d

Replies (56) Good night (9431) Bad night (784)
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(571): View more from Virginia

i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.

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(571): i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms. http://tfl.nu/yba6

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(916): View more from California

i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord

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(916): i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord http://tfl.nu/bi3f

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(646): View more from New York

Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?

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(646): Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP? http://tfl.nu/u40s

Replies (154) Good night (11580) Bad night (1923)
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(270): View more from Kentucky

I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell

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(270): I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell http://tfl.nu/jfse

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.

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(+44): There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside. http://tfl.nu/nyqa

Replies (2) Good night (1717) Bad night (705)
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(616): View more from Michigan

Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier

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(616): Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier http://tfl.nu/md1b

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.

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(215): I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls. http://tfl.nu/33f6

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.

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(908): I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping. http://tfl.nu/2e7t

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(908): View more from New Jersey

....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.

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(908): ....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle. http://tfl.nu/zsd1

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(913): View more from Kansas

Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?

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(913): Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk? http://tfl.nu/ufjz

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