"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
