I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
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