Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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