i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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