Say something about gay babies.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
