Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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